


lumen cordis.

by yae



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Body Horror, Depression, F/M, Final Fantasy XIV: Shadowbringers Spoilers, Hallucinations, Heavy Angst, Loneliness, Mania, Mild Gore, Multi, Patch 5.0: Shadowbringers Spoilers, Psychological Horror, References to Ancient Greek Religion & Lore, References to Illness, Suicidal Thoughts, Vomiting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-17
Updated: 2020-03-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:01:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,722
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23182135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yae/pseuds/yae
Summary: wol + aether/light sickness/poisoning = bad time butsick wol + ppl wol loves = good timeakawol tells yshtola and ryne that they feel fine, but the light is actually already way too much to bear. they cant take it any longer.
Relationships: Ardbert/Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Fray Myste/Warrior of Light, Solus zos Galvus | Emet-Selch/Warrior of Light
Comments: 2
Kudos: 33





	lumen cordis.

**Author's Note:**

> idk what else to tag this as so generally jus be mindful of the content below  
> its not the worst fic ever but its not that tame either as i really tried to express some darkness in it  
> (also note i wrote with ships in mind, hence tagging, but the content is actually fairly ambiguous)

The doors of the suite were thrown open far too roughly, a loud _bang_ sounding as they slammed against the walls. They shook in their hinges and slowly closed again on their own, Him’s hands shakily locking it behind her.

She ran further into her room with her arms wrapped around her shoulders, nails digging tight enough to rip her shirt. Though she’d wanted to make it to the bed or perhaps somewhere hygienic, she instead collapsed in front of the open window. A hacking cough which tore through her body and she doubled over, pressing her sweat-covered forehead against the cool tile. Him wheezed and gasped, choking on her breath and letting out another violent cough before—

_”Heur **rrkk—!!”**_

She slammed her palms against the floor, mouth opening and the light glowing forth. Up comes horridly burning white bile, splattering onto the ground below her as she vomits her very lifeforce from her being. Him gasped for air again only to be wracked by another gagging urge and more disgusting spittle being forcibly spat into the puddle. It calms just as suddenly as it started and remnants of charred aether drip from her lips, glowing and burning with the intensity of fire. All she can do is further wheeze, fingers curling.

“Gehh— Haahh... N-...” She whimpers pathetically to no one. “No... more...”

Her face snaps up, hands joining to clap onto the sides of her head as if to keep it from splitting apart. Her voice grows louder, desperate and pleading to whatever higher power may be listening...

“No more! Make it stop! Make it _stop!_ ”

Even if that higher power was a sin eater.

“Stop... stop... stop, stop, stopstopstop—!!” Head thrown back again with a bestial scream, eyes wide and tears forming. They are a sick, foggy white like heavily diluted plaster and finally spill over. The tears leave long streaks, painting her face with strips of marble as it once did Tesleen and so many innocent others. _Weak_ others. She had _three_ lightwardens inside of her. She was not weak, but she was cracking. The light within stirred, no— _churned_ , coating her insides with its false purity and consuming all it could.  
Him was tired and in pain, be it physical or emotional or mental. She didn’t want to be the warrior of light anymore. The warrior of _darkness._ She didn’t want to _be_ anything, she simply wanted to succumb and _die._

Him pulled her hair with another scream as if being loud would chase the insanity away. The pain, the desires, the _hunger._

Ah...

Killing something and supping upon its aether _really_ sounded good right now...

She slammed her fist against the tile, tears dripping to the floor and bespattering like thick blood. Her other hand slapping over her mouth in which her cheeks filled with air and she held back from vomiting more. It still came, bubbling up her throat and filling her mouth with its disgusting tastelessness. She tried to deny it, keep herself intact, and swallow but her body only rejected it further and Him spilled from behind her fingers. The light soaked and burned her hand until she pulled it away, nearly falling forward into the previous puddle as her attempt to force down the concoction of corruption only made everything worse. The woman wasn’t sure if it was the light-vomit or if her throat had actually started bleeding from the melting bile and tearing rasps. One thing was for sure—

While she had felt delirious and torn apart by her sickness,  
she had never heard a voice respond to her begging.

 _Three_ voices and _three_ figures that barely fit into her room yet still loomed over her tiny body.

_Storge._

_Eros._

_Philia._

Her eyes were wide as she stared at the defeated lightwardens, their manifested forms slightly transparent yet glowing as brightly as if they still lived. They surrounded their vessel menacingly, having eyes that did not see yet Him feeling them stare into her. She didn’t hear what they had first spoken and merely sat there, legs spilling out from her former position on her knees. Instead of speaking again— had they even spoken at all initially?— they resorted to crying maniacally, louder than they had sounded in life. Louder than anything Him had ever heard. She covered her ears but it did nothing and she feared her eardrums would shatter. She screamed back at them, howling her begs and pleas once more.

“Stop! Stop! No more, shut up, go away...! Make it stop, make it stop, I don’t want to do this anymore! Kill me, kill me, _kill me please!”_

They silenced, and then they  
wailed a _nd  
clouded and wrought  
an **d tortured her mind—**_

ㄴ Y o u r - m i n d - i s - n a r r o w. ㄱ

“Everyone else... guides— leads— forces— **controls** m-me...”

Eros rushed her, jaws opening wide and **s n a p p i n h** around her waist before disappearing while its weight knocked her onto her side.

【 Y o u r - b o d y - i s - a - t o m b. 】

”I’-..mm... t-trapped in... _here...”_

Philia’s long tongue wrapped tightly around her neck, chains **l o c k i n g** her ankles and wrists before disappearing while she curled up and hugged her bodily cocoon in self-protection.

〈 Y o u r - s o u l - i s - s u n d e r e d. 〉

“...I... don’t under-...stand...”

But Storge does not listen, **s t a b b i n g** two carved wings into her back to make her arch painfully before disappearing and letting her body convulse for a mere moment.

_She feels more light coming up—_

.̵̗̑:̵͇̠͓̈́”̷̧̰̲̋́,̸͔̥̎̔;̴͓̻̥͗̿̓’̷̧̩̳̏̑͝-̶̺̂̓͒;̶̞̻͘.̸͔͛͝:̸͈̪̮̍,̸͙̑”̸͕̫͂̍’̵̲̀͌—  
.̴̳͂:̵̳̰̙̚/̶͖̒͝”̶͍̙̦͊,̶̖̱̠͘̚?̵̥͠;̶̡̛͌̚’̶͖̈́)̷͍̎-̷̖̲͈̈́̿;̷̗̌̽.̴̪̞͖̍̎̂:̷̮̱̑̕¿̸̺̀,̴͍̻̪̊”̴̺͒̑ͅ’̷̪̙̄͒̂(̷̩͎̖̉͆͑...

〈 _W h e r e_ \- i s - y o u r - f a m i l y? 〉  
Storge chitters within her mind.  
〈 A l l - b u t - _u n k n o w n._ 〉

【 _W h e r e_ \- a r e - y o u r - f r i e n d s? 】 Philia gurgles within her mind.  
【 A w a i t i n g - t h e i r - _t o o l._ 】

ㄴ _W h e r e_ \- i s - y o u r - p a r t n e r? ㄱ  
Eros howls within her mind.  
ㄴ N e v e r - t o - b e - _f o u n d._ ㄱ

,  
l̴͖̲̾͋̾̒̏̐ī̶̪̤͖͔̖̱̉̕g̵̨̨̝̫̦͌ḩ̷̞͔̼̰̃ṭ̶͚̗̦͔͂̈͒̚s̷͉̰̃ͅu̴̧̓ç̴̛̘͙̻̯̼̃̈́͗c̶̛͉̗ͅǜ̷̺̊͂  
̷̠̲̫͕̾̇̂̈ḿ̴̖̜̗͈̓b̶̨̥̭̳̟̜̿̑͊̈f̴̯̞́̔̀̈̓̕ͅe̵̡̬̥̬̗̽̄̄͂̈̌ͅâ̶͈̜̖͜ş̴̼̤̗̠̋̓ẗ̷̡́̔̈́̈́̚͝ȇ̷̮̗̭̗̾̃̾a̶̗̼͈͌͌̎̈́͑ẗ̴̩͉̹͈͖́ͅs̷̡̳̰̯̙̀̀̆̈̔î̶̥̹̺͔̦͚͐̎͗̉̌  
̷̡̺̪̲͈̱͋n̴̡̢̹̹̤͔̎d̸̥̲̀̈́̀͑͗͛ȋ̴̺͖̝͉̍͑͑͗ė̶̊ͅa̸̛̦̗͖͑͆̿͘e̶̢̱̬̝̮̱͊͆̆̋͝ť̵̡̪̱͕̤̤ḣ̷̨̳̎̕ȩ̸̙̳̙̫̦̈̾͠r̵͚̓̌̐͘  
‘

The static speaks to her in tongues and the lightwardens begin to writhe like parasites. They wail and scream and snap, bodies contorting to reach for her soul. Their questions and answers repeat like mantras, echoing and echoing. Him is only limp now, eyes glassy and drool sputtering from her mouth as she relinquishes her body to trade the pain and agony for peace and silence—...

Her eyes, black paling to grey then white, drift closed.

...

.̵̗̑:̵͇̠͓̈́”̷̧̰̲̋́,̸͔̥̎̔;̴͓̻̥͗̿̓’̷̧̩̳̏̑͝-̶̺̂̓͒;̶̞̻͘.̸͔͛͝:̸͈̪̮̍,̸͙̑”̸͕̫͂̍’̵̲̀͌.̴̳͂:̵̳̰̙̚/̶͖̒͝”̶͍̙̦͊,̶̖̱̠͘̚?̵̥͠;̶̡̛͌̚’̶͖̈́)̷͍̎-̷̖̲͈̈́̿;̷̗̌̽.̴̪̞͖̍̎̂:̷̮̱̑̕¿̸̺̀,̴͍̻̪̊”̴̺͒̑ͅ’̷̪̙̄͒̂(̷̩͎̖̉͆͑  
.̵̗̑:̵͇̠͓̈́”̷̧̰̲̋́,̸͔̥̎̔;̴͓̻̥͗̿̓’̷̧̩̳̏̑͝-̶̺̂̓͒;̶̞̻͘.̸͔͛͝:̸͈̪̮̍,̸͙̑”̸͕̫͂̍’̵̲̀͌  
.̴̳͂:̵̳̰̙̚/̶͖̒͝”̶͍̙̦͊,̶̖̱̠͘̚?̵̥͠;̶̡̛͌̚’̶͖̈́)̷͍̎-̷̖̲͈̈́̿;̷̗̌̽.̴̪̞͖̍̎̂:̷̮̱̑̕¿̸̺̀,̴͍̻̪̊”̴̺͒̑ͅ’̷̪̙̄͒̂(̷̩͎̖̉͆͑

.̵̗̑:̵͇̠͓̈́”̷̧̰̲̋́,̸͔̥̎̔;̴͓̻̥͗̿̓’̷̧̩̳̏̑͝-̶̺̂̓͒;̶̞̻͘.̸͔͛͝:̸͈̪̮̍,̸͙̑”̸͕̫͂̍’̵̲̀͌.̴̳͂:̵̳̰̙̚/̶͖̒͝”̶͍̙̦͊,̶̖̱̠͘̚?̵̥͠;̶̡̛͌̚’̶͖̈́)̷͍̎-̷̖̲͈̈́̿;̷̗̌̽.̴̪̞͖̍̎̂:̷̮̱̑̕¿̸̺̀,̴͍̻̪̊  
.̵̗̑:̵͇̠͓̈́”̷̧̰̲̋́,̸͔̥̎̔;̴͓̻̥͗̿̓’̷̧̩̳̏̑͝-̶̺̂̓͒;̶̞̻͘.̸͔͛͝:̸͈̪̮̍,̸͙̑”̸͕̫͂̍’̵̲̀͌  
.̴̳͂:̵̳̰̙̚/̶͖̒͝”̶͍̙̦͊,̶̖̱̠͘̚?̵̥͠;̶̡̛͌̚’̶͖̈́)̷͍̎-̷̖̲͈̈́̿;̷̗̌̽.̴̪̞͖̍̎̂:̷̮̱̑̕¿̸̺̀,̴͍̻̪̊”̴̺͒̑ͅ’̷̪̙̄͒̂(̷̩͎̖̉͆͑

“̵̲̼̓̾̑̇̽S̶͕̦̻͉̥͎̎ę̸̡͚͈͆̊̄̍͜r̵̘̪̊̊v̴̡͍̲̝̹͆ȩ̸̲̯̥̘̭̉́.̴̬͊͜͝.̶̢̨̍̄̊.̴͇̰̰͐̅ ̶̭̣̤̮̼͗̈́̽̓̕  
̷̪̦͇̒̇S̸̯̀â̴̼v̸̜̩̈̈́e̵̖͒̏́.̷̀̏͜͝.̴̬̎̕.̴̱̻̞̉̒͠ ̴̼̫́̃͛  
S̵l̸a̴v̴e̵.̸.̸.̷  
̵̗́̈́͝ Slay...

I _faintly_ recall instructing we couldn’t keep carrying every bleedin’ heart’s burdens.”  
A voice chastises with a low grumble.  
“‘You need only ask’ and yet... Forget I was here, did you?”

She opens her eyes and sees only white. Yet the overwhelming static and cries of the wardens is lowered by the all-too-familiar sound of worn sollerets. Her gaze turns to the side and all she can see is a figure clad in pitch, greatsword being lowered in front of her almost protectively as he faces Storge. There’s a sigh and a shrug of one shoulder, as though this whole ordeal is a simple inconvenience not worth his full power.

“What was it I said in our first lesson, mm? ‘Drink not too deep’, well... I’d say you’ve more than earned the entire bottle now!”

The Dark Knight digs his heel into the aetherial ground, Plunging upon Storge and severing its many wings with ease. The lightwarden hisses sickeningly as the pure darkness from Fray’s arm burns back the light in a cruel turning of the tables. Just like that, the warden falls once more, and Fray returns to her side. He stabs the greatsword into the ground and kneels next to her. Him can see his red eyes glowing down at her from within the shadows and his voice becomes muffled by static once again.

“I’d called you their ̵t̷o̸o̸l̴ ̷o̷n̷c̶e̵ ̸a̷n̸d̶ ̷d̸i̵d̴ ̴y̸o̵u̸ ̷l̶i̸s̸t̶e̶n̷?̶ Ḧ̸͇̗a̷̗̍h̴̠̫͋̏!̵̗͍͇̓̄̍ ̸̠͉̘̓̀͒W̷̩̯͊̕̕ĥ̸̼͋͝y̵̥̗͘ ̷̙͈̪̏̏̅w̶̛̩̔̿o̸̹̒̉ͅŭ̴̧̼l̴͚͋͌̉d̵̨͖̔̓ ̸̡̦̒͠y̷̭̜͋ȯ̷̙̩͝u̸͎̫͔͊̐ ̸̗͝l̸̜̲̈́̊͘ḯ̵̹͍s̸̛̜͆̅t̷͔̓̈́͝e̵͍̽͊ǹ̶̡̘ ̵͖̇̐ṉ̸̨̂o̸̮̠͖͂́w̶͖̿͝ ̷͇͐t̵̡̞̹͌̚̚o̶̯̳͛̓͐͜ ̴̘̤̓s̶̫̈́ò̵̲ḿ̴̺̃ͅê̷͈̭ m̶͉̪̗̻̝̑̈́e̸͈͔̾̽͜ā̸͈̭̣̰͖͑́g̵̢̳̗̮͔̳͗͝ĕ̶̺̠̕͜r̴͚̖̠̒̌ ̸͎̹͎̦͑̉͆̂̅̊b̸͉̀̚ȩ̴̺͆̂͠a̵͕̫̺̯̻̬̎͘͠s̸͔̰͊̅͠͝t̴͔̟̘͍̙̓̈̃̽̾ ̷̯͉͖͔͍̫͑̍̽͑͗ẇ̵̛͔͖̖ä̸̪͍̘̋̀̂̋͝g̴̢̠̰̅̾̎̀ͅg̶̳̘̤͒͐͒ĺ̶̜̆̍͐͂̾i̴̧̙̤͑͋n̷͔̍͒͆̒̕ͅġ̴̡̩̤̥͐́̀̕͝ ̷̛̞͍̫͍̙ḯ̷̤̩̲͍̂ͅţ̸̰͎̮͌̆̀ś̶͛̑̂̋ͅ ̷̫̭̰̰̼̆̌̌ť̵̛̖̠̝̱̩͋ơ̴̮̼̳͙̞̎̉̔͂̕ṅ̵̺̰̗̀̾͒̕ģ̸̗̠̥̀̊̓̓̎́ŭ̶̺͓͇̭́̈͗̊e̸̢͕̪̻̭̽̈́ͅ?̷͖̪̗̈́̾“

...It... wasn’t Fray’s place... to deny Philia...

“H̶͍̎-̸͔̲̹̙͍͑͘H̸̻̽͠ę̸̹̋̎̎͘͝y̸̳͂! H̵͈̙͠ę̵̮͔̲̽̑͗̒͝y̴̛̥͆͊̍̄͗͜!̴̢̰̋̈́͝ C̷̺̮̙̰̥͐’̶̛̳m̴̬͚̕͜ŏ̷̧͖̲͍̓̇̇͑̿ǹ̷̡͆̚ ̵̟̌̒́̏ǹ̷̡͓̟͇͜ö̷̮̺̘́̽̔w̴̖̙̤̠̭͋,̴̭̦̪̖͑̀̊͊̀̊ ̴̺͚̯̻̒͑̍̋̈́͠Ḫ̷̌͂̍į̶̧̺̩͇̈́̅̐m̵̙͈͂̈,̸̛̹̏̏̓̓̚i̴̘͈̰͛ṱ̷̣͍̿’̴͍̘̐s̵̥̕͝ ̶̨̬̼̏͂̎b̸̭̻͘e̵̻͈̐̌e̵̩̯̐͌̑ǹ̸̞̎ ̷̝̝̀ä̸̤̪́̐ ç̷̌͗e̷̬̥̩̅́n̵̢͕̗͝t̶̛̘̖̔u̶͎͗r̷̨̹̫͋ỷ̷͖ ̸̰͇͌̊s̴̼̬͑͜ị̶̫̍̈́̍ń̷̠̙̾͜c̷̫̙̀ê̵̫ ̵̧͂̒̓I̸͈̓ c̴̬̤͔̔̒̓ö̶͇́͘͘ǚ̷͎́l̵̢͌̕͝ḓ̵͂͊ ̷̹̏͐̋t̶͔̤͍̊a̸͎̘̍̈͝l̷̟̽͝ͅk̶̢͔̃̇ a̷ ̶p̶o̷o̷r̴ ̵s̴a̶p̵’̴s̴ ̶e̶a̶r̵ ̸o̵f̸f̷!̷ ̶D̸o̵n̶’̸t̷ ̵g̶o̶ all sin eater on me now...!”

She glances to the opposite side now, a familiar bearish figure leaning over her with his brows knit in worry. Yet they relax and a small, relieved smile appears on his face when he sees her look at him.

“I knew something was wrong, you should’ve said something, idiot! Wicked White, you’re just like Renda-Rae... Guess I’ve no choice. Can’t say anything smooth like your mystery figure there, but...!”

He stands and turns to face Philia, unsheathing his axe all in one swift motion. He grits his teeth at the warden, expression sour. A small murmur, “please hit...” and Ardbert charges Philia, a single Fell Cleave being all he needs to cut the lightwarden and its chains to ribbons. He steps back, more accurately stumbles, and his gaze doesn’t leave Philia for a second until it is fully dissipated. The coast clear, he is back to his former position and hovering over Him. Ardbert gives her another warm smile, a brow quirking as it turns into him scoffing.

“To think, you felled t̷h̶e̷m̵ ̸e̶a̷c̴h̸ ̴a̴l̵r̶e̵a̴d̵y̶ ̶a̴n̴d̶ ̵y̷e̸t̴ f̶̮̹͇́͆͠i̷̱̕n̷̜̙̑d̷̫̣̕ ̵̗̭̈́̃̆y̶͓̏ͅô̷͉̜̖̍́u̷̪͑̈́r̴̲̱̣͂s̵͚̍̅̈́ȅ̸̢̂l̴̖̀͑̉f̸͓͎͗ ̴̻̾̈́s̶̖̠̗͂̅t̷̖̻̀͘͝r̸̢͔̯̿͒ṳ̴̺̈́̅g̶̭̳͔̃ǵ̴͇̍l̶̮̬̬͆̅̉i̴͎̽n̵͎͈̅g̴̩̉ ̸̺̓w̶̬̯͒̉̉ī̸̧̈́t̷̡̑͋̇ḩ̶̦̮̐̔͝ ̴̝̯̰͊͑̒t̸͖͆̕h̸͍̃͆̋ę̶̛̰i̸̱̔r̵̮͖̜͂͝ ṕ̵̨̭̤̰̻͋̂̇̀h̸̭͔͍̀̑̒a̸̧̢̛̳̦ń̶̨̠͍̔̽̽̎ͅt̷̥̥͕͆͑̌̚͝o̵̝̙̓m̶͖̆͒s̵̹̠̠͈̙̏̈́͊͒̌͌͜.̶̧̲̙̞́̽̆.̴͉͕̝̩̈̃̈̓͒̓͜.̷̤̼̦͈̬̜͂ ̷̧͉̎̎͋͗̂͊J̷͍̱͙̟̣͌̾̾̎͛͜ư̴̦̩͕͕̜̔̈́̾̌͠s̵̻̤͌͑̈́́̎̄ṯ̶̻̃̒ ̶̥̲̞͓̟̞̚c̷̨͚̰̦̐̽̂̔̓ą̶̍́̆̽n̸̮̄ͅ’̴̧̯̾̑͒͘͠t̷̯̦͝ ̵͎͓͊̐l̴͖̼͔̉̔̏͝ẹ̶̙̣͖͔͆̑̈́͊̏͘͜t̴̜̻̏̾̏ ̷̻̪͈̄̌̐̾̆̚y̶̫̌̾ơ̵̧̩̝͝ȗ̶̖̖͎̻̔̌͑͘͝ͅ ̷̠͒ͅo̵̹͕̮̫͐͝u̵̡̳͚͛t̸̰̥͓̆ ̷̪̺̯̑̈͒̂̎̏o̴͔̒̎̓f̴̧̞̏̕ ̵̲̬́͐̏m̷̬͂̚y̶̺͇̆̓͑ ş̴̳͙̒̎̑̕i̶̦̭͑͗̈́̈́͝g̶̥̪̅̽h̴̦͖̱̲͑̔̇͘t̵̨̹͋,̶̱̦͐͒̏ ḫ̸̃͆̇͐̕û̴͙̫̮̾̂ḧ̴̭͙̳́̒̈́̄?̴̨̰̱̖͓͓͆͗̉”̷̡̛̅́͑̑̽

Yet Ardbert quickly realizes he’s melted back into the white noise as Him looks blankly to the unending sky. He grabs her body and lifts, holding her tightly in his arms. Fray joins him then, one hand clutching the woman’s shoulder while the other curls around her armpit to pull her into an intimate embrace.  
The two spirits wrap themselves around Him as if together they could stand a chance against the last light that plagued her mind. Yet Eros had sunk its claws deep, reaching not only her mind but her very _soul._ Ardbert grit his teeth to angrily hiss a curse while Fray merely closed his eyes and tightened his grip. They relished in her body, hoping she could feel their love for her even if one still remained unaccounted for...

_S̴̛̫̈́̌̒n̴̪̲̎̍͋̕̕͝a̸̫̞̳̳̤̪̓́̑́͘͝p̴̭̎͘!̵̛̐̋̓̅͜_

The blindingly white infinity shimmered like a mirage and disappeared, placing them back within the inn room. Ardbert’s eyes widened and he craned his head to look toward the noise. The static was cleared and there stood—

“Emet-Selch... ascian. Begone with you now, mutt, tail between your legs. You have already met your end by her hand.” The ascian gave a great sigh as he lowered his just-snapped fingers from the air, his other hand resting on his hip. He glared at the lightwarden with plain contempt,

_“You do not want to meet it by mine.”_

Ardbert snapped his head at Eros, eyes big as dinner plates when he saw the warden actually quiver. Its tail ducked down and it gave a forlorn, beaten howl before melting into the aether like its brethren. No static returned, no light shined annoyingly into their eyes... Had they...?

“Hm. Partner, eh.”

Fray examined Emet-Selch thoroughly, eyes narrowed. He seemed not the least bit impressed. “You look as though I could breathe in your general direction and your back would snap in two, old man.”

The ascian clicked his tongue at the shade, brow quirking.

“Watch your words, phantom. Besides, _you_ as her familial figure...” A shake of the head, disappointed, arms folding.

“I am much more ‘family’ to her than anyone could ever be. Especially _you_ , ascian. _Adversary._ ” Fray seemed to grow just as annoyed.

“ _I_ know her quite well inside and out, before your simple existence was even _thought_ of. Quite the pair upon you to challenge an ascian, let alone that ascian being me.”

“‘Tis no challenge, it’s a threat and promise of which I stand safely behind.” It couldn’t be physically seen but it was obvious Fray was smirking. “Raising your little snap against me means raising it against _her._ ”

Ardbert could only stand and watch in awe, eyes still wide. He... didn’t understand any of it. Emet-Selch, her partner? What did that mean? He was her enemy and naturally his as well. There was no sort of partnership to be made between man and ascian...? Yes?  
A loud gasp for air and Ardbert turned around in a flash. Him...!

The woman clutched at her throat and coughed again, groaning in pain. She panted and looked around before flinching as Ardbert leaned down and put a hand on her shoulder.

“Hey there, you alright? Didn’t think I’d get to have action like that for a long time...”

She looked at him with confusion and touched her head, wincing. It was coming back now, slowly... The... lightwardens, right. She had almost succumbed to them, the light, but then...  
Fray... Him looked over her shoulder at the approaching knight who shrugged his shoulders at her. He took care of Storge and...  
Ardbert? She glanced back at him and he gave her a single dip of his head, a nod, almost reassuringly. Yes, that’s it... He had Philia... So then, Eros—!  
Him scrambled to her feet, whipping around with a little stumble as she took in the sight of who was her supposed partner.

...  
..  
.

“What? Couldn’t you at least _pretend_ you are happy I stepped in to save you?”

Her disappointment was all too obvious. Brows furrowing, lips pursing into thin lines... Not even Eros itself would make a joke this cruel. Er, she hoped. Him turned back around, giving Emet-Selch the cold shoulder only to find Fray’s manifestation had dispersed and Ardbert was now nowhere to be seen. Robed arms snaked around her waist and she jumped, grabbing them to shove the ascian off of her.

“Wait, hero, I did quite a bit to make sure not a hair on your precious head was touched... I believe you owe me.”

“I-I don’t owe you anything!!” Her voice was beaten and hoarse but she still sounded as defiant as normal, cheeks puffing out. A huff and she shook her head. “I didn’t ask you to save me either...”

“So? What was I to do, then? Watch as you became the strongest lightwarden yet known to man within the Crystarium? Oh, no, there is much for you to still do...”

“What’s that mean...?”

“Concern yourself not with it, little warrior. If I were you, I would be more focused on how to control the light rather than let it control you.” He tightened his grip around her waist, almost threateningly. “I told you my terms. Take of the lightwardens and sustain your form... _Then_ we may speak as equals.”

His arms disappeared and she turned to look at him once again. But...

“...Gone...” She couldn’t help sounding sad. “I’m... alone again.”

Him looked down at her feet and stared at the now-dry puddle of her distorted spew. She was feeling much better now, but...  
A small sigh and she rubbed her shoulder. Well... she could clean her mess later... For now,

back to work.

**Author's Note:**

> n e way this was meant to be a vent fic but by the time i finished researching for stuff, i wasnt upset anymore.. still liked da idea tho so i wrote it anyway!
> 
> actually really proud of this one, proud of most my work, but im really into this one so i hope u guys enjoy
> 
> sorry no horney :( take kool factz instead:  
> philia stands for brotherly love (friendship), storge stands for familial love, and eros stands for romantic love


End file.
